So I haven't blogged in quite a long time. And I think that's just what happens sometimes. We start out doing something and then as time progresses it might end up falling to the wayside. I think it's just the natural order of things. Some things are only for a season.
And then there's people like me who will make random blog posts years later. I have so much I could write about, and you come to a point that although a blog is very much a public forum, you really write for yourself. Like keeping a journal, this is your record of your life and thoughts. I think that's cool.
So anyway, I wanted to share something. I have been feeling a little bit guilty because I've been trying to find my way back to God and this week I have failed rather largely to spend any time with Him. Like any.... maybe with the exception of quick goodnight prayers as I fall asleep. By the way, I have been falling asleep quite well in the past week which I am sure is due to the prayers being made on my behalf by the beautiful soul at my Women's Bible study on Tuesdays. I have only been twice, but I know I so desperately need that group and I am so incredibly blessed that God would provide it for me.
I am just so bursting with stuff that I don't even know where I want to begin sharing. I am very excited to see what God is doing in both my life and the lives of the people around me and those I have been praying for. One in particular is my brother and sister in law starting a new venture (both of them!) to bring their families to a better place financially. (Which is something I actually prayed about in my "war room" a little while ago and it just fell to the wayside as life happened, although I didn't forget about them or my desire to pray for them... I think I just got lost in my own stuff for a while.) So anyway, my sister in law is selling Cozy Candles. I'm a big supporter for her so if you want to check out her page it's BeyondBlessed. I was trying to get a direct link to her facebook group because it's like a whole community in itself, but I cant figure out how to get the direct link. However if anyone wants to buy any of the candles from my sister in law, this it the link to her shop https://bwordproductions.com/cozy/1601/ . I actually am burning my Caribbean Escape Candle right now. It smells seriously AMAZING.
So my brother in law is also doing something online. I don't quite understand all of it yet, but it is an online gaming thing where he games and talks to people online and he can earn money through subscriptions so he will earns money doing this on the side. His goal is to be able to earn enough money that he can spend more time with his wife and daughter at home. So if you're into gaming you can check him out at https://www.twitch.tv/rellik1771
After he told me about it, I was like... that's so cool, I think i'm going to see about doing something like that with my crochet, but it would be a while before I would be able to get something like that set up.
So anyway, I'm so far on tangent from what I came here wanting to share. So let's get to that. I sat down tonight with the intention of studying a little more with the scriptures that were given to us for Tuesdays Bible Study and let me tell you a little bit about this process.
So I started out wanting to look at the context of each of the verses I was looking at to see if I could get a better understanding of them. So the theme was love Go and the first part of the Study was Things that are key in building a love relationship with God. I haven't even been through the first point in the first section and I'm like "God you're speaking to me." so this is what happened.
The first verse I looked at was Matthew 6:33 which said But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness and all these things will be added to you. (NASB) I read for context and this is a verse I had highlighted before in my Bible, because it was one that reminded me that God takes care of the needs of his people. So I wrote down a challenge for myself to, When I need something, instead of attempting to just go and purchase it or find financing, to go first to God and ask for it and then sit back and see what He does.
So I was like Okay, cool. That is a challenge I really want to try, you know... like Test God in this to see if what He says is true because I believe he's trying to tell me something.
So I went on to the next verse, which was Psalm 46:10 "He says Be still and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth" (NIV)
I read for context and it was talking about God being our refuge and strength and how we ought not to be disheartened by the world because He is God. Nothing stuck out super strong in this one to me, no challenges, so I went on to the next verse which was James 4:8, which reads "come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded." (NIV) Only... in looking up this verse, I somehow ended up on 1st Peter 4:8 and was reading those verses for context, but it was verse 7 that I was drawn back to... which reads "Now the end of all things is near; therefore, be serious and disciplined for prayer." (HCSB) So i pondered that verse for a little while and was reading context and trying to understand how vs 8's admonition to have an intense love for one another was the verse I was reading in the hand out... and then i realized I read the wrong book, but I was like, that's okay, That one verse really stuck out to me and I don't think it was an accident that God took me there.
So I go back to James 4, where I was really supposed to be and I started to read the verse and then the chapter for context, and I got to verse 2 and closed my Bible and I said OKAY, I GET IT.
And what does James 4:2 say? YOU DO NOT HAVE BECAUSE YOU DO NOT ASK.
Okay. Okay! OKAY! I see a theme here. God, I believe you want me to go to you in Prayer, God I believe that you want me to lay my needs, and DESIRES, I feel impressed that God wants to speak to even my desires. So Im just sitting here thinking about this, and I'm thinking about needing new clothing because mine is wearing out and the stuff I bought from Walmart a few months ago is already starting to become unusable. I'm thinking about Marraige, about in asking God for a spouse (a part of a facebook group I'm a part of, it started with a challenge of praying for your future spouse), I started thinking about my brother and his wife and the ventures they are starting, then my whole lists of prayers that I was bringing before Him and I just get this impression that God is saying to me to test Him in this.
But as I'm sitting here I'm also thinking can I really be hearing this from God because Jesus says it is written do not put the Lord your God to the test, so I looked up the context and it brought me to the Old Testament Scripture where it seemed like there was something specific at Massah that they were being told not to test God and I think it was in relation to sin, but then I saw the Scripture in Malachi 3:10 Bring the full tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food in my house. And thereby put me to the test, says the Lord of hosts, if I will not open the windows of heaven for you and pour down for you a blessing until there is no more need.
You do not have because you do not ask. I think that one is going to stick with me for a while.
Anyway, It is late and I've already written a lot, so until I decide to write again, take care.
